Hilarious Yelp Reviews of Top U.S. Destinations + Printable Travel Posters

Hilarious Yelp Reviews of Top U.S. Destinations Grand Canyon framed

Hilarious Yelp Reviews of Top U.S. Destinations: Have a laugh!

By Julia Morrissey

Iconic U.S. attractions like the White House in Washington D.C., Mount Rushmore in South Dakota, and the Empire State Building in New York City are certainly well known places, but are they worth all the hype? Some visitors took to Yelp to say not so much. Check out some of the hilarious reviews below, as well as some useful information to consider before planning a trip to these population destinations. We sure had a good laugh with these Hilarious Yelp Reviews of Top U.S. Destinations! Plus, you’ll find awesome printable travel posters by Apartment Guide that you can download (that is if the Yelp reviews don’t get to you!)

 

  1. The Empire State Building, New York

“This building is not as tall as it looks in photos” – Bart B.

Empire State Building framed

When it was completed in 1931, the Empire State Building was the tallest skyscraper in the world standing at 1,451 feet high. This 102 story tall building has a breathtaking view of New York City from the 102nd-floor observation deck. Although this building attracts about 4 million visitors each year, not everyone is super impressed with it. As one Yelp reviewer candidly stated, “This building is not as tall as it looks in photos.”

 

What to consider before planning a trip

  • You’ll probably have to wait three to four hours before reaching the top of the building.
  • If you’re not going to New York City solely for the purpose of seeing the Empire State Building, consider getting a view of the city from another place, such as the Rockefeller Center observation deck.
  • Make sure your tickets are from a valid vendor and will be accepted at the door.

 

  1. Mount Rushmore, South Dakota

“I do not think it is patriotic to deface a mountain.” – P K.”

Mount Rushmore framed

Hilarious Yelp Reviews of Top U.S. Destinations continues with Mount Rushmore. The faces of U.S. presidents George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln and Theodore Roosevelt are carved into stone in South Dakota’s Black Hills National Forest. The project, which was a ploy to attract tourists to South Dakota, began in 1927 and took 14 years to complete. The strategy was a huge success, and Mount Rushmore continues to attract near 2 million visitors each year. Most visitors enjoy the memorial, but others, such as one Yelp reviewer are less than enamored. One Yelp reviewer stated, “I do not think it is patriotic to deface a mountain.”

What to consider before planning a trip

  • If you’re taking a road trip through South Dakota make sure to research other things to do in the area ahead of time.
  • There is a parking fee at the memorial, and the National Parks and Federal Recreational Lands Annual Pass, the Military Annual Pass, the Senior Pass, the Access Pass and the Every Kid Outdoors Pass don’t cover it.

 

  1. The White House, District of Columbia

“The tour is self guided and truthfully the rooms look old and very dated.” – Joy J.

White House framed

George Washington selected the location of the White House in 1791, and after eight years of construction, President John Adams and his wife were the first to move into the unfinished house in 1800. Since John Adams, every president has occupied the White House, and the history of this building (which has 412 doors, 147 windows, 28 fireplaces, 8 staircases, and 3 elevators) goes far beyond the construction of its walls. Alas, not everyone is moved by the building’s history and beauty. As Joy noted on Yelp, “The tour is self guided and truthfully the rooms look old and very dated.”

What to consider before planning a trip

  • Have a plan B in mind. Since tours are in high demand, they can be cancelled at the last minute.
  • You can’t use video cameras, flash photography, or live streaming.
  • The tour is self-guided, so you may want to do some research ahead of time to understand the history of the White House.

 

  1. Grand Canyon National Park, Arizona

“If you like rocks and lots of dirt, this is the place. You hit the jackpot!” – Sara L.

Grand Canyon framed

Each year approximately 5.5 million people visit the Grand Canyon in Arizona (aka the Grand Canyon State). The majority of visitors, about 90 percent, see the South Rim, which is open all year. Only about 10 percent of people visit the North Rim, where lodging and food services are only open between May 15th and October 15th. Though the Grand Canyon is known for its draw dropping views, not everyone feels the hype. One Yelp reviewer simply wrote, “If you like rocks and lots of dirt, this is the place.”

What to consider before planning a trip

  • Some trails are long and can become challenging due to weather.
  • The cost of this trip can get expensive between entrance fees, lodging, and food.
  • Summer is the busiest season and the trails can get crowded.

 

  1. Golden Gate Bridge, San Francisco

“Very disappointing. Sad. This “bridge” was neither golden nor a gate.” – Colby W.

Golden Gate Bridge framed

According to San Francisco Travel, The Golden Gate Bridge is #1 on every visitor’s list. The bridge, which opened in 1937, was built at a cost of $35 million in principal and $39 million in interest and even 11 workers’ lives. The bridge is 1.7 miles long and has sidewalks for pedestrians to walk along and take in the full experience. Not all visitors, however, are blown away (even though it can get very windy too!). As one yelp reviewer wrote, “This “bridge” was neither golden nor a gate.”

What to consider before planning a trip

  • Research payment ahead of time. If you’re crossing the bridge in the southbound direction, toward San Francisco, you’ll need a form of electronic payment.
  • Plan for colder weather. The bridge can get very windy!
  • Expect crowds as this is a population destination. So, if you’re traveling in the near future be sure to remember your mask.

 

We hope you got a kick out of these Hilarious Yelp Reviews of Top U.S. Destinations!

Guest Blogger at

Julia Morrissey is a content creator who writes compelling stories and develops helpful guides. Her passion for creative writing and advocacy has led her to cover a range of unique topics. She lives in New York City and enjoys spending her free time with her rescue dog Maya, jogging in Central Park, and finding new vegan dining options around the city.

25 thoughts on “Hilarious Yelp Reviews of Top U.S. Destinations + Printable Travel Posters

  • July 7, 2020 at 12:37 am
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    Those are hilarious. I haven’t been to many of the places. Except New York. The funny reviews definitely make me wonder how I’ll feel when I do travel to the others.

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  • July 6, 2020 at 6:07 pm
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    Oh my gosh so funny! Perfect laugh for a Monday.

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  • July 6, 2020 at 5:42 pm
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    These are too funny. I love people who can make a joke out of everything.

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  • July 6, 2020 at 5:37 pm
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    I love such printable posters which are related to travel. In US, I would love to have some bridges posters either from NYC or San Francisco. Even the natural wonders poster from Grand Canyon of Arizona amazes me. But reading reviews of them by reviewers are also very hilarious as Empire State building is not so tall as seen in poster. Sometimes reading reviews also is very hilarious and good with posters, you have pointed out some genuine reviews too.

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  • July 6, 2020 at 12:56 pm
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    I don’t really read Yelp reviews, but these are absolutely hilarious! Would love to print some for my house. Even with these descriptions, I would still like to visit the White House and the Grand Canyon!

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  • July 5, 2020 at 7:33 pm
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    Bahahaa, I had never thought of Mount Rushmore as defacing a mountain. These people are so creative and cynical. 🙂 And I suppose the Grand Canyon really is just rocks and dirt. I actually didn’t realize the Golden Gate Bridge isn’t golden, so that is very surprising given the name!

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  • July 5, 2020 at 1:02 pm
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    These are funny, and a bit ridiculous! People can really just be kind of clueless. We always thoroughly research our destinations so there are no surprises.

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    • July 5, 2020 at 10:33 pm
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      Haha agreed! Research is such an important part of trip planning!

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  • July 5, 2020 at 3:19 am
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    I’ve always enjoyed reading reviews of places before I travel. It makes it easier to know what to expect this way, but these reviews are really funny.

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    • July 5, 2020 at 10:34 pm
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      We could all use a little laugher 🙂 I agree reading reviews is a great way to plan!

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  • July 4, 2020 at 4:05 pm
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    I can’t stop laughing… This is hilarious. Somehow I’ve never bothered to read Yelp reviews, I’ve only stuck to Google reviews. I think I should start reading Yelp reviews, just to tickle those funny bones…. Hahahaha…
    “If you like rocks & lot of dirt, this is the place”? Hahaha… Sounds like my husband, when I drag him to such places that I love to visit and he, not much.
    “Not as tall as it looks”? That’s the feel I got when I visited Eiffel Tower…

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    • July 5, 2020 at 10:45 am
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      Lol! These are so funny. Thanks for this ..needed some laughter therapy

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  • July 4, 2020 at 2:25 pm
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    So glad you enjoyed them! I haven’t made it to the Grand Canyon yet, but heard it’s incredible! On my list for sure!!

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  • July 4, 2020 at 6:36 am
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    These are really funny. I absolutely loved every single of them. However, I would love to have the Grand Canyon one because it fits me so well. I am one of those who love rocks and the dirt. I also liked the Golden Gate bridge one. So very true, I wonder why the bridge was named Golden bridge when it is not Golden in colour.Super cool stuff.

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  • July 4, 2020 at 5:58 am
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    So true, the Golden Gate Bridge is neither golden nor a gate. I haven’t been on the White House tour but judging by what I’ve seen on TV I could believe that the rooms are a bit outdated. On a side note, I would love to see Mount Rushmore.

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  • July 3, 2020 at 10:59 pm
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    Haha, these are the best! I would love to put the San Francisco one up in our house as we hold that city near and dear to our hearts here.

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    • July 4, 2020 at 2:26 pm
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      I hope you print it! 🙂

      Reply
  • July 3, 2020 at 2:08 pm
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    This gave me a good laugh this morning. I love the quote about the golden gate bridge as When we visited last year I said to my partner, It’s not golden though it’s red haha. How nostalgic for me lol. Really interesting post as it’s funny to see what goes through peoples minds when writing these reviews. I really want all these posters too they are stunning!

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    • July 4, 2020 at 2:29 pm
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      I hope you print some of them! They look great framed 🙂 Happy you enjoyed. I felt the same when I visited the GG bridge!

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  • July 3, 2020 at 12:41 pm
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    This was very funny. I actually love when I find more “honest” reviews of places that don’t try to glorify a place when it was not that kind of experience for you. Different people find different places interesting. I have been to all of these places in your blog post and appreciate your trip planning tips. Those are often the kind of things I look for in reviews and blog posts.

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    • July 4, 2020 at 2:29 pm
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      Honesty is the best policy 😉

      Reply
  • July 3, 2020 at 8:53 am
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    I’ve been to most of these places except for Mt Rushmore and the Whitehouse. I feel like the people I travelled with would have left these funny reviews! One of my favourite quotes from when I went to the Grand Canyon was “well that’s just a big hole isn’t it” which sums up who I travelled with haha

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    • July 4, 2020 at 12:00 pm
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      Haha those are funny! Though people should do a little research before visiting a place, one look at a picture of the golden gate bridge will show you that it has no gate and its red. Or that a historic building would have old dating looking rooms. That’s kind of the point! But it’s still amusing to see how surprises they are about it.

      Reply

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